Well, I posted my dilemma concerning the offensive tile (see previouspost) on my Facebook page and on the Facebook page of the Phoenix Remodernists (an arts group I belong to) and I got tons of feedback, suggestions, options, and opinions. Very helpful, yet UNhelpful in that I now have even more to consider.
Suggestions include using the tile, tossing it, literally tossing it (so it beaks) and including it in broken form, grinding it into dust and including the dust in the grout between the tiles, turning it over and including it as a blank tile as a tribute to rape victims, keeping it out of the project but using it as a coaster at the reception, returning it to whoever made it (not possible.... I don't know who made it), making an adjunct piece from all the tiles that don't fit,
I'm close to a decision, but will let all of the input percolate for a while. Whatever I decide, it will be a very personal decision on many levels (artistic, philosophical, historically, experientially, and societally) and I will not be sharing it. I have several reasons for this: I want the piece to stand on its own and not be overshadowed by the inclusion or exclusion of this particular tile. Plus, I think not sharing the decision adds a little the mystery to the work.
So when it's done, be sure to look for it (or it's absence) in the finished piece!